My Grad Left Me Feeling Empty

As-salam alaikum my beautiful sis!

I hope this meets you in the best of iman and health in sha Allah.

Welcome to the very first of Tifah & Co.’s many newsletters in sha Allah. A way for us to connect deeper with each other and to share our life experiences in sha Allah. A place of gentleness and kindness in sha Allah, a love letter from me to you.

I’m so excited to be launching this newsletter, and I hope you are equally as excited to be reading it! Alhamdulillah, to see Tifah & Co. live is truly amazing and I’m grateful to have you here.

Okay, enough of the introductions, let’s get to the bottom of this letter. You’re probably thinking, “Umm sis, this title seems a bit heavy”. Maybe, but sis, it’s truly the reality of life. A story can’t be told without a beginning, and so I have to share my beginnings with you. It’s why this is the first letter I'm sending out to you, and the only way I think you’ll fully understand the reason behind Tifah & Co., in sha Allah.

My grad left me feeling empty. I didn’t understand why at the time. I was sitting in the grad hall, and I thought to myself, “Is this really it?”. I felt guilty for not feeling excited, for not being as grateful as I should have been. I know it may sound harsh, but I truly did feel unfulfilled. As I slowly navigated post-grad life, it was only by Allah that I realised that nothing in this life, of worldly pleasures, is worth chasing. The turning point for me would happen much later though, and it was after I attended the Light Upon Light Winter Conference. Sis, that event was everything I needed and more.

The conference was something I had eagerly anticipated. I had been in this state of just going through the motions of life. I went there expecting a wholesome Islamic event to boost my iman, which it was Alhamdulillah, but I came out a whole different person - a person with a new mission in life. I was sat at the event silently crying, - yes, I’m that girl that cries at virtually everything - thinking, “What am I even doing with my life?”. Seeing all the speakers and Muslim organisations that came to this event, hearing how they’ve impacted the Ummah, and witnessing it myself, I realised this was it. This was what I wanted out of life, serving Allah's deen. I didn’t have all the answers then and still don’t now, but I came home feeling like I couldn’t just go back to the regular me anymore. Something had shifted in me, and it was a longing to do more for my Akhirah, a feeling that I couldn’t ignore, even if I tried.

I think about what society teaches us, almost promises us even. A lie that has shaped some of our beliefs and something I had to take a moment to assess. This idea that once we’ve gotten that thing we so badly want to achieve, we’ll be happy and finally feel like life is worth living. But what about it is truly what you need? You get to that point sis, and you only want more than that and then it’s just greed. There’s always a next thing to be chasing in this life after you’ve gotten that thing you wanted. At some point, you have to ask yourself, when will it be enough?

Allah made me realise that nothing I chase in this life, of worldly pleasures, would ever truly satisfy me. It feels nice for a few moments, and then, the illusion wears off, the void is still there. I’ll tell you this for free, this world will never ever satisfy you. The true satisfaction and contentment is in remembering Allah, as Allah says "Surely in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find comfort." (Qur'an 13:28). Now, I’m not saying you should drop out of school or quit your job. Allah created this life after all, and we have to go through it to get closer to Him. Pass through the Dunya, don't let the Dunya pass through you. I’m saying, switch the focus from doing these things only because you want nice things in this life, to doing them because you want to please Allah, you want to get closer to Him. Chase the Akhirah and the Dunya and Akhirah will follow you.

Anas ibn Malik reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Whoever is concerned about the Hereafter, Allah will place richness in his heart, bring his affairs together, and the world will inevitably come to him. Whoever is concerned about the world, Allah will place poverty between his eyes, disorder his affairs, and he will get nothing of the world but what is decreed for him.”

Source: Sunan al-Tirmidhī 2465

Grade: Sahih (authentic) according to Al-Albani

With the help of Allah and by His will, I truly hope to be able to build Tifah & Co. to be of benefit in this life and in the next.

Thank you for allowing me to share my journey with you. I hope to be a part of yours in sha Allah.

With love,

Latifah.

Founder, Tifah & Co.